I used to be a camp counselor during my adolescence and had a lot of trouble controlling the wild kids who were there.  Ever since I've been interested in knowing  how some counselors were able to get kids to behave.   When I was in school the children were very disrespectful of their teachers.   One teacher who was especially nice tried to teach them poetry.  They tore into her and by the end of the class she was crying.  We had one teacher everyone thought was mean, but everyone was scared of her and behaved in her class. 

    Is the solution to controlling kids, scaring the hell out of them?  Some kids are hard to scare.  They enjoy getting the teacher to yell. 

    I have a friend who tutors children in a boarding school in the evenings.  Most of these kids were put there because there parents can't stand having the kids at home.  He tutors the good ones and ignores the misbehaving ones and eventually the misbehaving ones who want attention start behaving more so he can teach them.  Using the desire of kids for attention as a way to get them to behave seems to me to be a good idea.  He also does things like bake brownies and bring them for the kids. By baking brownies he's being aggressively nice instead of just responding in a nice way if the kids are nice. One thing he said he has learned is not to sweat the small stuff.



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